too busy?

you know when you read something that you find to be just SO true that you feel the full weight of it- the good gives you an ohmygodYES! moment and the bad makes you feel like you’re looking into one of those mirrors that shows every pore, blemish and wrinkle?  that’s how i felt reading this article after the brilliant jamie posted about it here.  when i got sick i shifted my whole life around from it’s work-centered focus to a life that included a lot more downtime.  and that guilt i’d formerly created and carried around during time off- it evaporated. i felt free, i found happiness in my freedom and in the time i took for myself every day. it felt self indulgent but necessary. i loved it.

lately (partly because of the house buying/move/IRS audit/wedding season and partly because it’s a slippery slope into old habits) i’ve been feeling guilty about neglecting a to-do list that truly has no end, saying “yes” to more work and saying “no” to social invitations and telling myself and others that i’m “too busy”.  that’s bullshit, and i’m calling myself out on it. i’m choosing to be “too busy” by scheduling a chaotic life.  and not because it’s the best thing for me, or because it’s what i really want but because I AM CAUGHT UP IN OLD IDEAS!

it’s not that i don’t have ambitions- i do, and they are large and will take work and dedication to accomplish.  but in a sense i’m not seeing the forest for the trees.  if i devote so much of my energy into work ambitions and don’t devote enough of my energies enjoying all the fun in life, i won’t truly be happy. i’ll be career successful and that one aspect of me will be fulfilled. but for me, that’s not where true happiness lies.  i find my happiest times are when i am balanced- when i’m devoting time to all areas of my life that bring me satisfaction, not hyper-focusing on one.

luckily a big part of the reason we chose palm springs is because of this very thing- we see the value in a life well lived, with our work lives being a healthy part of it but not all consuming. we want to travel, spend time with each other and friends, have hobbies and plenty of time for fun. we want to spend time with people who are in the same mind frame, even if they only feel that way for a weekend at a time. we want to live a slower paced life, and really enjoy it, you know? i’m looking forward to reading, hiking, day dreaming, exploring, practicing my pool hand-stand, doing yoga, riding bikes, watching the sun slip over the mountains, cooking & entertaining, and most of all: just being.  i hope you take the time to read tim kreider’s article, it’s a good one and i’d love to hear your two cents!  image via