How To Learn To Accept Your Weaknesses And Not Lose Confidence

Everyone wants to be perfect. Instagram feeds are full of accomplishments and the ideal vacations, work prioritizes exceptional performance, and so on. However, perfection is an illusion, and it isn’t one that any person can maintain. Everyone you meet comes with flaws and weaknesses even if we can’t perceive them, and in this article, we’ll explore why covering up your weaknesses isn’t a good way to live, and how accepting your shortcomings can actually make your confidence sustainable.

Is “Faking It Till You Make It” A Viable Strategy?

You may have heard of the term “Fake it till you make it”- It means to simply keep pretending you’re confident until you’ve fully tricked your brain into believing it. This can definitely serve as a very powerful tool, but it isn’t without drawbacks. Let’s explore the positives first:

People believe what they see: Simply pretending to be confident will make people believe that that’s who you are in truth. This can improve people’s perception of you, create opportunities through networking, and cause people to trust and like you more.
It’ll be easier for you to gain inertia: The first step is often the hardest. By pretending to be confident and taking that leap, you’ll often find that things aren’t as hard as you mentally built them up to be. This allows you to take on challenges or tasks that would have given you reason for pause in the past.
Positive feedback loops: Simply acting confident can create an aura to you that people around you prefer. This can elicit positive responses from your family, friends, and coworkers, which then boosts your real confidence. This positive feedback loop repeats until you don’t feel like you’re faking confidence anymore.
You’ll learn through practice: Experience is the best teacher, and the best way to learn is through practice. When you thrust yourself into situations that require skill and confidence, you’re made to learn and adapt. In this way, you will quickly acquire the skills you formerly lacked.

Now, let’s explore the drawbacks:

It ignores underlying issues: Faking confidence is a temporary recourse- You still need to address the reasons for your lack of confidence. This could be because you lack a certain skill, you may have anxiety, or you don’t know how to carry out typical social interactions.
You can’t fake confidence for everything: While faking confidence can work wonders for social situations, you cannot expect just confidence to replace essential skills or qualifications you need to effectively carry out your responsibilities.
You risk being exposed: Faking confidence to move up in the workplace is well and fine until your superiors realize you don’t have the skills necessary to do your work. This can result in devastating consequences at work, possibly even leading to termination.
You may feel disingenuous: When you’re always pretending to be confident, you aren’t showing your true self to the people around you. Since you’re always putting up a facade, you may feel like you aren’t being truly seen, and your social battery may run out much faster.

Why Is Self-Acceptance Vital?

Though faking confidence can work as a temporary solution, the only way to really deal with the weaknesses that caused your confidence issues in the first place is to address them. In order to resolve your weaknesses, the first step is to self-reflect and identify what your strengths and weaknesses are. If you struggle with trauma, ADHD, or other issues, The Liven App can help you learn about yourself and even push you in the direction you need to go to heal. Once you’ve understood what your weaknesses are, you can begin setting up the foundations for genuine growth. It eventually leads to a cascade of benefits:

Better mental health: By accepting and acknowledging your true self, you won’t engage in as much self-criticism. You’ll know what you need to work on and begin improving in those areas, which reduces your risk of stress, anxiety and depression.
Increased confidence: Once you learn about and accept your flaws, you’ll be able to work on improving yourself, as well as accept your strengths. This leads to a stronger sense of self-esteem.
Personal growth: When you aren’t burdened by constant negativity and the stress of not being good enough, you’ll be able to take the time to introspect on what’s really important to you and work on bettering yourself.

How You Can Begin To Embrace Your Weaknesses And Accept Yourself

Most people tend to be incredibly critical of themselves. Your mental health and success depends on how you see yourself, so let’s explore how you can improve your own self-image:

Extend to yourself the same kindness you would to others: Take a second and think about how you would treat a friend who is dealing with the same issues as you. If you would be kind to them, why wouldn’t you treat yourself the same way? You’re every bit as deserving of the compassion you give others.
Be aware of your inner critic: It’s easy to forget that the voice of negativity and criticism you constantly hear in your head isn’t a reflection of reality, but just a projection of your own insecurities and anxiety.
Identify self-sabotage: When we are afraid of how we might be perceived, we tend to self-sabotage. It’s important to notice when we’re doing this and put a stop to it.
Improve what you can: There’s no point in dwelling over things you can’t change. Fix/improve what you can, and let the rest remain.
Perfect is the enemy of good: The idea that whatever you do needs to be perfect is stopping you from starting at all. A mediocre accomplishment is better than no accomplishment at all.
Don’t hold on to the past: Problems you’ve had in the past do not determine your success in the future. No matter what you may have struggled with, don’t ruminate over these things as it won’t benefit you in any way. Focus on what you have now, and how you can work on making your future brighter.

Conclusion

Through self-acceptance, you aren’t giving up on improving yourself. Self-acceptance allows you to cease the constant barrage of self-criticism, acknowledge your shortcomings, and then work on productive means of addressing them through kindness and honesty. Think of it as upgrading from unproductive criticism to constructive criticism. This fosters genuine growth, and in turn, confidence. Once you accept yourself as a whole, your mental health will soar and you’ll finally be as confident as you want to be.